Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Sad and happy times

Nate picked up Godiva's ashes at the vet, and they had made a paw print for us. It kind of makes me sad, but I'm happy to have some remembrance of my best dog. Nate wants to get a dog when Marcus is older, and I'm sure I'll be okay with it at that point, but I'm still grieving.

On a happier note, Marcus is showing more and more personality. He laughs these enormous loud belly laughs, and likes very certain things- rough housing with dad, going on walks, milk- and dislikes very specific things- solid food in general, standing still, going to bed, and napping. In fact, he doesn't really nap. Ack. Finally, though, being a mom is a great experience. I used to feel really guilty because all I could think about is how exhausted I was, and holy crap, doesn't this kid stop crying ever? But eventually he stopped the 24/7 crying, and now seeing the baby first thing in the morning and when I pick him up from daycare is the best feeling. No matter how difficult my patients have been that day (and trust me that sometimes they are extremely difficult), I forget everything else when I see my smiling boy. We're thinking about whether we want a second baby or not -what if Marcus IS the easy baby?!?- but I had so many health complications, we're really cautious. Also, we still don't know what's going on right now with the liver/bile duct/gall bladder issues- I'm still undergoing testing. I know we can travel more and so on with one child, but I remember being lonely as an only child as well. We'll see.

I'm looking forward to the weekend...Friday I'm giving a talk for the pre-health club at Nate's community college about what it's like to be a physician/navy psychiatrist...I can't believe anyone wants me to influence young people. I'm also working on Umberto Eco's new book but it's slow going and I think my kindle library lending period is going to run out before I finish. In fact, I KNOW I won't finish in time. Do you feel guilty when you start a book and don't finish?

No comments:

Post a Comment